I saw My Sister’s Keeper tonight–it’s been a while since the last time a movie made me cry like this.

It’s certainly touching (duh, it’s Jodi Picolt–she’s a genius in capturing feelings, as we can tell from 19 Minutes) but at the same time draws attention to some controversial issues and makes one think.

First, how far should science go when it comes down to family matters? Is in vitro fertilization a righteous way to save your baby’s life? As a Christian, I should instantly say No since humans are not meant to be created this way. But as human, I have to ask myself, What if I were Sara? Am I really gonna watch my baby die when I know there is a method out there that has 80% chance of success in preventing this to happen? I don’t know.

But what I do know is that, no matter what, this IVF baby is gonna be labeled “designer baby” forever. It will be created and genetically altered just for another person–not fair. How would she/he feel when she/he grow up? Of course they could live a life filled with love just like Anna did, but the very purpose of this child is based on the theory of utility–”it comes to life only because we need to save someone else’s life; otherwise, it wouldn’t have come to existence”–how cruel. Even if the child will lead a happy life and feel like a hero having saved another life, what sort of things does he/she have to go through? Is it even his/her own will to endure all the pain of operations and surgeries? Again, the end cannot justify the means.

Secondly, how much control should parents have over their children? There has been a long history of philosophical debate on this issue, and I remember when I took philosophy class, this is my least favorite issue of all simply because it’s too complicated to make up my mind. Tonight I lost myself in the contradictory thoughts again. On one hand, everyone must be able to take control of his own body, rejecting any kind of manipulation against his will, including children. On the other hand, a child might be just  immature that it is very likely that he’ll make a wrong decision upon which he’ll regret later in life. This is when parent guidance comes into play. But how far should they go? Is there univeral truth on this matter or is it case by case? Again, I don’t know.

Lastly, there’s the let-go part, which I bet really won tears from the audience. It’s good to be persistent, to not quit easily, and to carry on. However, sometimes when we are so involved in something, we tend to forget what we really need. Sara fought 14 years to keep her daughter’s life–she gave up her career, marriage, and life–I mean, what else can motherhood lead to? But she was so scared of letting Kate go that she forgot to or, rather, did not dare ask her daughter what she wanted. We try to give our beloved ones what we think is the best for them but often overlook what they want for themselves. For Kate, death is a relief, and there’s no shame in that. When Kate said to her mom, “Remember that one time when I went to a summer camp, you told me to take a seat on the left side of the bus by the window so that I can see you when the bus takes off? I’m just taking the same seat now”, Sara finally realized that she cannot keep her daughter any more. It’s time to let go.

A further point–
When we are fighting so hard for something, when we are holding on so tight to something, when we are losing sight of beautiful things along the way when we are chasing something, we might as well ask, Have I lost myself?

Side note: the soundtrack for the movie is fabulous. Every song selected is meant for the movie.